What we have been up to

Hey everyone! It has been a while since I have done a post, and we have had a TON of stuff going on lately, and as I have said before writing is a way for me to deal with things and I usually feel better once I have written something. So this is probably going to be a longer post, just a heads up!

So in August, my cousin and her husband welcomed their first baby, a little boy. He is the cutest! I love being able to spend as much time with him as I do, it definitely made my baby fever go through the roof!

In August, we also got a new puppy. She is a blue heeler Border collie mix. We named her Ryder. She is the sweetest puppy; she is now 10 (on April 9^th) months old. She is very vocal at times, and for such a little thing her bark sounds pretty vicious. She isn’t too fond of dogs that are bigger than her, but she LOVES my best friends dog, Malice, who is a Bichon Frise. She isn’t as hyper as we expected her to be, and training has been a bit more difficult than it was with Lennox, but she’s a pretty good dog. Unfortunately, we had to put Lennox down in December. It wasn't an easy decision, but it was something that needed to be done. I miss Lennie everyday.

In September, Jesse's mom was involved in a car accident, and she is beyond lucky to be alive. We are so thankful that she is still with us!

In October I saw my OB/GYN for a yearly check up and I needed to have a lump in my right breast checked out. I first noticed the bump when I learned I was pregnant, and it continued to grow. After my miscarriage, I kind of forgot about it until I noticed it had grown significantly. So my doctor sent me to the Woman’s center for an ultrasound.

In November I had my initial consult, and the doctor who performed the ultrasound wanted to do a biopsy because he said there were something’s about the lump that he didn’t like. So on November 24^th I had a biopsy done, the actual procedure took less than 10 minutes, but I definitely felt sore afterwards. The results of the biopsy were good. It was just a fibroadenoma, which is just a big word for a type of benign tumor. The doctor did recommend having it removed though because it was about 3cm in size and when we do get pregnant again, it would most likely grow and could affect my chances of breast-feeding.

December 29^th, 2015 I had the lump removed. I have NEVER had any type of surgery before and I have never had any anesthesia. So this was a new experience for me. I was extremely nervous the day of surgery. Jesse had to work so my grandparents took me and stayed to take me home. I remember the nurse giving me something in my IV to make me a little calmer, and I didn’t feel it t first, but all the sudden I felt like I had just done 15 or so shots and it was hitting me hard and fast. I started laughing and told the nurse I think I did some shots, and she laughed.

Once we got to the operating room I moved onto the operating table and they put something on my legs and strapped my arms down. They put the mask on my face, and I remember my arm and face got really hot and it felt like someone was pushing down on them, and the next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery. The surgeon was AMAZING; I couldn’t of been any happier with him. Apparently as soon as he was done I was talking in the operating room, telling him that my grandma and I were going dress shopping and going out to dinner.

I was in recovery for a long time; my blood pressure kept dropping, at one point it was on 60/80, so I had to stay in recovery until they got it back up. After they got my blood pressure up, I was able to go home. We did go dress shopping after, and I definitely over did it. The next few days I slept a lot, but overall I wasn’t feeling too bad, just tired.

In January my dad borrowed my car, and was involved in a minor accident, but it has turned into a giant shit show.

In February, on Jesse’s birthday, he got a speeding ticket. Totally his fault, but it doesn’t make it suck any less.

In March, I was involved in my “first” accident, it shook me up a bit, and I did get a concussion from it. I hit my head on my driver door window, and it shattered. I am still without a car, because insurance cant decided if they are going to total it, or fix it. So I am in a rental until further notice.

Jesse was crashed his car, luckily he was fine, and his car was fine too. Just had to replace the headlights. The officer who gave him a ride said he was lucky to be alive. His car spun around, and flew across the other side of the highway and hit a tree.

 

The only other news we really have, is we are officially trying for a baby. I will be blogging this journey, hopefully resulting in a successful pregnancy. We are very excited to see what the next chapter in our lives look like!

PCOS & Pregnancy/Infant loss awareness

September was PCOS awareness month. PCOS stands for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. PCOS is an imbalance with hormones. Many women with PCOS have trouble getting pregnant, and or staying pregnant. PCOS symptoms are not the same for everyone.

1 in 10 and 1 in 20 women of childbearing age has PCOS. Researchers also think insulin may be linked to PCOS. Many women with PCOS have too much insulin in their bodies because they have problems using it. Excess insulin appears to increase production of androgen.

Some of the symptoms of PCOS include Infertility (not able to get pregnant) because of not ovulating. In fact, PCOS is the most common cause of female infertility.

•   Infrequent, absent, and/or irregular menstrual periods

•   Cysts on the ovaries

•   Acne, oily skin, or dandruff

•   Weight gain or obesity, usually with extra weight around the waist

•   Patches of skin on the neck, arms, breasts, or thighs that are thick and dark brown or black

•   Skin tags — excess flaps of skin in the armpits or neck area

•   Pelvic pain

•   Anxiety or depression

Women with PCOS have higher chances of Miscarriages!

PCOS is very real; I was diagnosed when I was 18. I knew NOTHING about it, and honestly I am still learning. PCOS does not define me though, its not my story, its just a fraction. Yes, we have had trouble getting pregnant. Yes, we do want children. For those who follow my blogs, well you know that we have had two miscarriages. Yes, it was devastating. Yes, we are trying. No, we haven’t been to the doctor for more help. Yes, I have taken clomid (drug to simulate ovulation). If we don’t get pregnant within the next year, we will be going to see an RE (reproductive endocrinologist) to explore our options.

October is Pregnancy & Infant loss awareness month. So if you know someone who is struggling with the loss of a pregnancy, or SIDS, etc. be kind to them, say a prayer and let them know that you love them. You may have forgotten, but they haven’t, and the loss is still just as fresh and raw even if it was a long time ago. We will always remember the day it happened, the missed due dates, and the what-ifs. We think about who they might have been and how different our lives would be. We shouldn’t have to feel alone, even though we do. This is more common than most people think. It’s hard to understand unless you have experienced the pain that comes with loving something so much and then having it taking away just as fast. The pain is very real, and you feel like it is your fault. Two songs that I absolutely adore, and that helped me tremendously through both of our losses are, Praise you inthe Storm & Bring the Rain. I hope this helps someone somewhere, and remember you’re never alone.

Jesus, Bring the rain.

Angel Baby #1- July 2013

Angel Baby#2- April 2015

Patiently waiting for our Rainbow baby 

 

Date Night

So for those of you who follow me on FB know I am moving into a new position at work and I couldn’t be more excited for this new chapter with work. I start August 10^th, which feels so long from now! So Jesse and I went out to dinner to celebrate my new job, a just to have a date night.

ShoGun is where we ended up, which is this yummy Japanese restaurant that we don’t eat very often. We haven’t had it in a long time, so we figured we would celebrate my new job as well as date night. So two Mai Tais later and I definitely wasn’t feeling any pain, and I even had shrimp and for those of you who know me, know what a huge deal that is. I NEVER eat seafood.

After dinner we stopped at our best friends house and visited with them for a few hours. I don’t know what I would do with out Jill and Jay! They are honestly our favorite people to hang out with! So over all date night was a huge success.

Target Fun

I finally got a KitchenAid Mixer! In Ice Blue! I have wanted this color for a long time but every time we go to Target, they are ALWAYS out of that color and I didn’t feel like ordering one online. So we went to Target to pick up a few things, and a few things turned into a cart full, which is why Jesse hates going to Target. Happens Every. Single. Time.

So we were walking past the kitchen stuff and I noticed that they had Ice Blue products sitting out so we HAD to go look at the stuff…. They had one, ONE, Ice Blue KitchenAid mixer left, AND it was on SALE!!!!!! I had to have it. It was a sign and I knew it, Jesse didn’t feel that way and certainly didn’t share in my excitement for a new kitchen gadget but obviously he isn’t right in the head. So into the cart it goes.

We needed a new clear shower liner, and a rug so we stopped in the bath section. Which resulted in buying a new liner, shower curtain, rug, hooks, a toothbrush holder, and a bath caddy. All of which look awesome in the bathroom. Now just a few decorations and the bathroom will be complete. Jesse bought a plunger. That was his purchase, Sorry I didn't take a picture of it!

As you read above, I have a problem: A Target shopping problem. I go in for one item and walk out with stuff that I don’t really need. That is why I don’t have a Target store card; I would be in so much trouble!